The Moolah Machine
by BoxOfScraps
Summary: John Max Maxley as he drives through...wherever, picking up passengers and putting them to the test in his on the streets game show!  Cash Cab parody, anyone?


"And now, the $1000 question." Max Maxley quietly said. He looked at the little monitor on the screen and then looked at the camera smugly. "What is the letter in the alphabet that comes after 'A'?" The two stoned idiots in the cab seats looked at each other...then laughed. And laughed. And then the timer ran out. "Oh, I'm sorry, you two douchebags ran out of time. Now get the hell out."

"But dude..." Stoner one said. "You didn't tell us the right answer."

Max turned around in his seat and glared at him. "It's 'B'. As in...BYE!" He pressed a button and the two were ejected out of the car. "Enjoy the walk, bitch!"

~~One hour and one dose of medication later~~

"Alright, let's see who are next contestants are, shall we?" Max pulled into a stop and let in a dude and a hot chick. "Hey there, welcome to the Moolah Machine."

"Weren't you supposed to surprise us or something?" The man asked.

Max groaned to himself quietly. "Yeah, I'm supposed to do a lot of things. Let's go!" The car took off, without Max even knowing where he was going. "What's your names? Where to? Doing good? Yeah, I don't care, first question now. Point or something if we're near someplace where you want to be, good enough? Good." The first question popped up on the screen. "This marine animal has one of, if not the, deepest voices on the planet. It could be heard for 100 miles underwater...what is it? Think fast, 'cause I don't have much patience here."

The two looked at each other and talked amongst themselves. "Okay, I think I know it." The man said. "I did take marine biology in college, after all."

"No one cares, dick, what's the answer?"

"It's the-"

And then Iron Man flew in and landed inbetween the two. He blasted them both out of the windows of the car. "I am Iron Man, and take me to a bar. Any bar, I don't give a crap, really."

"Why don't you just fly there, you flew in here..." Max asked, not really paying attention to the road at all.

"Why don't you shut up!" Iron Man almost blasted him, but then saw the screen. "Ooh, trivia game, count me in."

Max looked at the screen and then back at Tony. "I have an idea, answer this question right and beers on me. Answer it wrong and-"

"I don't kill you?"

Max gulped quickly. "That works."

Iron Man stared at the screen for a good five minutes before raising his mask to itch his head. "I don't...mobile shout out?" Max handed him a phone, but Iron Man just held out his fingers and used one he apparently had in his suit. "Nah, I got this...and I know just who to call. …._Unfortunately._"

After a moment the other line was picked up. "HI!" Aquaman shouted loudly from his end. "FINALLY someone called me! I never get any calls!"

"I wonder why..." Tony mumbled to himself. "Anyway, I have a question."

"YES!"

Tony removed the fingers from his face for a moment, thinking about what he's doing, but he did need the answer. "I didn't ask you yet...and it isn't a yes or no question!"

"Sorry, I just got excited! No one EVER calls me!"

"That's because you're an idiot, now listen!" Tony repeated the question to Aquaman, for the sake of not having to type it up again here. "Well?"

There was silence for a moment. "That's easy! It's the blue...WHAAAAAALLLLEEEEE! I'm actually riding one right now!"

"I don't want to know what exactly you mean by that..."

"HEY! Want to go see a movie together sometim-" And then Tony hung up on him.

Iron Man looked back at Max and gestured to his hands. "Clearly you heard that answer, so I win."

"Fine...beers on me."

"Yeah, no, I'm just screwing with you, you're a total dick. Just felt like wasting some time. ...BYE!" Iron Man flew out through the hole he came in.

Max looked around for a moment, then decided to switch the monitor off, getting rid of the question. But then a customer came in. "Hey, welcome to-" He turned and noticed that The Hulk had gotten in. "...Fanfuckingtastic..."

"HULK WANT GO TO CHUCK E. CHEESE!"


End file.
